image for Obama to trace Bob Marley's footsteps in historic state visit

Skinning up near the Mount of Olives

Washington – “The President has expressed a wish to pray at Jerusalem’s Wailing Wall,” a White House aide said today, “scene of Bob Marley’s nativity and eternal shrine to reggae’s Rastafarai deity.”

Next week’s Israel visit will be Obama’s first and the President is expected to light up at the holy site, “nothing really combustible, probably just a votive candle,” according to his diary secretary.

The tradition was first started by US President Bill Clinton who famously donated his Monica Lewinsky cigar to Yasser Arafat when the two men preyed together at the historic site.

“Smoking and not inhaling sure sucks,” an aide of the late Palestinian leader commented on Arafat’s participation at the event, “unlike Monica, a confirmed non-smoker.”

On Wednesday Barack and Michelle Obama will retrace those historic foot-faults – er… footsteps! – in an effort to rekindle the flagging Middle East Piss Process.

The First Lady’s schedule also includes a trip to the the Mount of Olives which Rastafarian folklore reckons is where Popeye first honeymooned with his cartoon bride.

An ounce of Wailing Wall Weed retails at a bargain 100 Shekels per gram.

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